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Come on guys, really?

Posted by Ryan | Filed under Humor

Gotta show my face at the behest of our great overlord, Brandon. So, how’s it goin’ folks? Workin’ hard out there to keep the faith? If not, just take a look at this video from my good friend Mr. Gladstone

What, not convinced? I mean, come on, it’s a cat that kind of has a pattern that looks like Jesus. And if that wasn’t enough, you’ve got the one and only “Cheesus”. You might recall the article posted by our Great Master recently about laminin. I thought it was ridiculous and laughed as we all surely did, but- Wait, what? People took that seriously? Uh…well, as I was saying, come on. This video is more a bash at Fox news and CNN than it is religion, but the point is that these stories were presented on mainstream TV and taken seriously. Well, by christian people anyway.

Two parts of this piss me off. First, take a look at 1:40. See the little cheeto carefully preserved in it’s display case on the right? We wouldn’t want to destroy a work of god. The second…keep watching. Hear it? 1:43 or so. It’s the guy that chimes in at the end, replying to a statement that it, in fact, ‘is not a work of god, but may bring some good’ with the educated statement of “Duhhhh!”

What is wrong with people? This doesn’t seem like blind desperation to anyone? Why aren’t these people embarrassed by claiming god has blessed them with a bite-sized crucifix?

Hey, you know, I think there might be something to this hidden message thing. I can feel it… God is speaking to the world, what could he be trying to say?

Something like that

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Jesus and the Switch

Posted by Brandon | Filed under Humor

An image was sent to me by a reader that I thought was pretty funny. Check it out:

Jesus and the Switch

And if you didn’t catch it, this blog title was a very poor attempt at a humorous pun.

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Dinosaurs Man’s Best Friend?

Posted by Brandon | Filed under Humor

I have decided where I am going on my next vacation: Petersburg, Kentucky. What’s in Petersburg you ask? Why the brand new (2007 really) creationist museum!

This has to be the most fantastic of all museums. Ken Ham has created a museum that teaches young earth creationism, which is the uhh *cough* theory *cough* that the all life on earth started between six and ten thousand years ago. Anyone who’s taken an elementary science class will laugh at this, but I digress.

Now, when I first heard about this museum, I wasn’t too angry. I thought that it would teach about baby Jesus and the like. Throw in some Adam and Eve and mix in a little bit of resurrection talk for good measure. But oh no, they take it a step (leap) too far.

They teach that humans and dinosaurs were alive during the same period of time and that the T-Rex didn’t eat meat until Adam had committed the original sin. Man oh man, this makes me want to tear my eyeballs out. There’s so much scientific data that the earth is 4.54 billion years old, but all of that is lost in the futile attempts at the religious to try and justify their false beliefs.

To prove these awesome theories they try and use science. But unfortunately a spoonful of pseudo-science doesn’t help this reasoning go down. And yes, I used a horrible Mary Poppins reference. Here’s a good BBC clip on a museum that only America could produce. Enjoy:

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The 9 Most Badass Bible Verses

Posted by Brandon | Filed under Humor

This link is pretty old but I think it’s probably the funniest thing I have read in a long while. It basically lists a few of the more ridiculous bible verses. Here’s the link. Some of them are not so funny as they are just weird and/or horrifying.

I think the bible is wonderful personally. Funny, sad, cruel and humorous. You can go through a wide assortment of emotions in just a few chapters. Want to read about a cruel angry God? The old testament is just the thing! Want a nicer, more friendly God? Then why not try the new testament.

Seriously, have any of you christians ever read the bible?

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Banana Proves God’s Existence

Posted by Brandon | Filed under Humor

I have to say this is my favorite video on the proof of God. These two guys, Kirk Cameron and Ray Comfort, tour the road and use this demonstration to prove God’s existence. I have to rate this video #1 on the internet. It’s fantastic.

On a more serious note: Wild bananas don’t really look like this. They are much more difficult to open and have giant seeds inside of them. The bananas we see in the store today were genetically engineered by people to be more convienent. But all of this is irrelvant because what about other fruits like a coconut? Has anyone ever tried to open a coconut? I beat the crap out of one once and stabbed at it for 30 minutes.

I’ll also post this other video which is allegedly another “Atheist’s Nightmare”, which shows how very little Christians understand evolution.

This second video is so retarded that it’s hard for me to put into words how I feel. This ‘experiment’ with the peanut butter is silly. There was not (to the best of my knowledge) peanut butter when life began. It is true that scientists are not sure exactly how life came about but this does not mean we will never know. It’s easy to say “Well, God made everything!” but that doesn’t necessarily mean you are correct. The chance of life forming was probably very slim. And the specific conditions are currently unknown but nobody thinks life can spring from peanut butter. That’s horrible science and these guys need to really think before they make videos.

The moral of the story: Yes, bananas are so well adjusted for humans that there absolutely must be an all-knowing and kindly God looking down on us and answering our prayers. And that hey, if life can’t come from peanut butter then evolution must be false. Kudos religious people, you win again.